The yoghurt may be fat free but I certainly ain't

Last night I felt fat. Of course, I AM fat but I felt as if I had suddenly stacked on half a stone in an hour or so. This was because I slightly over-ate at dinner. All within the SB rules but I still felt mentally uncomfortable about it. I had my pudding of ¾ cup of blueberries with 3tsp FF yoghurt but the yoghurt was about to go off and so I added a sachet of LF jelly powder to c100g of yoghurt (I had read this was a way to flavour FF yoghurt) to use it up. GAAAAHHHHH! I must read the small print. Apparently you should sprinkle a little bit on and mix it to taste, not whack the whole damn sachet in. It was not nice (weirdly salty) and eye-wateringly strong. So I had to mix new yoghurt into it and ultimately ended up with a lot of not-very-nice, lurid pink yoghurt. I ate half of it (and the other half this morning). It was strangely compelling in the end. I think it could work if I hadn’t gone a bit bonkers on the jelly powder. Anyway, the upshot is that I ate probably c150g yoghurt that I hadn’t planned to and this made me feel instantly fat. I physically felt it I mean. I didn’t weigh myself – too afraid to prove myself right.

Very a-feared of the WI on Tuesday after last week’s pathetic total and given that we’ve got a friend over for dinner on Saturday night. I have planned a very sneakily SB compliant menu:

Starter – probably a scallop salad – or parma ham and pear
Main – Sausages cooked in red wine with bacon and shallots (proper decent sausages not full of fillers and eyelids, testicles etc etc) with mash and celeriac mash (only the latter for me)
Cheese (again, only a mere nibble for me and I don’t eat it with biscuits anyway)
Pudding – mousse made with dark chocolate, egg and ground hazelnuts (no sugar)
I’ll have a glass of wine – maybe two.

So, I’ve put the effort into trying not to let this derail me but I’m still very, very anxious. After a stellar eating week and a loss of a measly ¾ lb it’s pretty scary to think what Scales of Doom might have to snarl at me (via its evil moutpiece, the dial of doom) on Tuesday.

So, yesterday’s food consumption:

B – egg ‘muffins’ and V8
S – 6 walnuts
L – home-made courgette soup, SF jelly
S – LF cottage cheese and chicory
D – prawns and stir fried vegetables
P – blueberries and yoghurt. Then c150g of yoghurt with half a sachet of jelly powder. And a hot choc, SB style. I hope that the very meagreness of the stir fry (just beansprouts, mushrooms, pak choi, a pepper, sugar snap peas and garlic, ginger and chilli and soy sauce) make up for all this.

Three things to feel grateful for from yesterday:
1. Choir – we’re singing Faure’s Requiem and it’s just beautiful
2. Resisted sweets again in the office
3. A colleague told me that the top I was wearing (purple angora v-neck jumper) was a colour that really suited me.

Weekend – I have a night home alone tonight as bf is over at a friend’s. My night will be an orgy of chick-flicks. Well, hopefully I’ll squeeze two in anyway - this still counts as absolute square eyededness. Then shopping and cooking tomorrow and not much on Sunday (making soup for the following week will feature as will reading the papers). Hope everyone has a good weekend, despite the grey skies and rain. Spring must be on the way by now...