To further dispel this odd opinion that seems to have built up in my readers (yes, Mrs, I'm looking at YOU!) about my athletic prowess, I have shirked a run this week and although I could make it up, I'm not going to. I was intending to run Monday, Tuesday and Thursday this week; I did Monday but felt so awful on Tuesday that I didn't run. And I very nearly didn't this morning either, scrabbling round in my mind for a litany of excuses - still having a period, b/f was late back from carousing last night and I didn't get to sleep until after midnight and had to get up at 6am to run and was already over-tired.... And by the way, how does he do that? He gets in late - I am in bed, I don't get to sleep because I'm aware he'll be in, then I can't sleep because I'm aware he's moving around (probably bouncing off inanimate objects), he gets in to bed and falls asleep in 3 seconds, I lie awake for a further half hour, humph.
Heroically, despite these grevious obstacles, I did indeed run this morning - with bad grace, both literally and figuratively - but I did. Hmmm, if that's heroic, what hero would I be? Puffalot? The Great Waddler? Wheezygirl?
Anyway, it means I've only done 2 runs this week, not the prescribed 3. And although I could go tomorrow, I HAVE NO INTENTION OF DOING SO. I'm even off tomorrow but I'm going to Canary Wharf to look in the Next and Monsoon sales en route to Greenwich Market to buy a belt I've been thinking about since December. If I have time I might go to TK Maxx (but probably won't). I've only been once before and hated it but so many people seem to get great bargains that I feel I ought to give it another bash. And I'm going to have a humungous lie-in. I may watch a chick-flick. I will definitely re-varnish my finger and toe nails (not the same colour as I think that's too WAG - actually had a row with the girl in Nails Inc about this once). Running has no place in this self-indulgent day. I feel a bit naughty and rebellious - and I fear that there's a wave of guilt which will come and engulf me but hopefully not until I'm safely over the danger period (ie the time I might actually be compelled to run).
I think I'm feeling a bit more numb about packs (this is good). Obviously I'm about to eat (weekend away with friends this weekend - and next actually) so hopefully I can re-gain numbness swiftly afterwards. My weight was a bit further down yesterday. And I keep telling myself, I've only got 6 weeks until I'll be eating again for a month. Not thinking beyond that just yet. It's scary because I don't think I'll be at goal but pack-boredom and desire for food is overwhelming the fear. Every day I re-think what I'll eat on my birthday (27 August) - this is what I think about whilst I run actually, what irony! - we're definitely going for posh dim sum at Yauatcha in the evening, mmm.