Tuesday, 17 July 2007

Day 22 - and the titles are back, hurrah!

Forgive me viewers, it's been a week since my last confession. Er, I mean blog.

And it CAN'T be put down to time flying whilst I'm having fun!

I'm still feeling very fatigued but the headaches have eased a bit which is a real relief. I was taking one or two of my very strong prescription migraine drugs a day and it still wasn't getting rid of the headaches. Drying my hair is still a struggle though!

WI last night was a real damp squib - the scales were broken. They brought in a pair of ordinary bathroom scales but they showed that I lost a fraction under 8lbs - which sadly I'm pretty confident isn't true for several reasons: 1) on my scales at home it showed more like 1-2lbs (although my scales are bizarrely random and this would be a bitter disappointment) 2) I've not lost that much even in week 1 and 3) another girl lost 6lbs on them and she had only had small losses to date too - and had had pizza (although if you can lose 6lbs a week on pizza sign me up!). I'm not sure if the scales are being repaired or replaced but I do feel that you need to have the same scales all the time to really see what's going on. But if I have only lost 1-2lbs I will be devastated. I don't find this diet easy and therefore I want a decent pay off for it!

I also developed an aversion to the vegetable soup - I can literally feel my gorge rising, which is quite interesting as I've never known what a gorge was. I still don't know but I can certainly feel it hurtling up towards my mouth! I have to say I'm finding most of the packs difficult to get down (I suspect chocolate will be joining vegetable as intolerable) but I'm determined not to give in to my thoughts ("Maybe I could just do it on Bouillon and/or miso soup and stop the soup packs entirely"). I have decided however that on my birthday at the end of August I'm not going to make myself miserable on packs. I've read that you stay in ketosis if you have less than 50g carbohydrates so I thought I'd have a shake for breakfast, some ham for lunch and 2 chicken drumsticks and - bliss - a white nectarine in the evening. I think that sounds sensible. Of course it's the pschological damage it might do with wanting food. But I do anyway! B/f is very wary - he says if I break the diet after that I will have to re-pay him all the money he's contributed to my weekly fees. Fair enough I suppose. I have no intention of not sticking to the 100 days though - not least because we've booked the flights now for the first bit of our holiday in Turkey in October. What do you think about the birthday feast? Am I being sensible (in terms of indulgence) or delusional?

I had a horrid 'fat' experience last week. I was meeting b/f in the park and was early - and by some bizarre quirk of fate it wasn't raining. So I sat on a bench with my book. A middle aged woman came and sat on the other end of the bench. She was, I'm afraid, very badly dressed (opaque American tights with open toed ugly sandals for instance) and rather overweight - but not grossly so. Some young Meditteranean tourist boy came and sat in the middle and there was much laughing as his friend took a photo. I don't think I was being oversensitive that the intention was to show how unattractive British women were - a big joke. It really stung and I wished I'd got up and walked away. But you always think of these things AFTER the event.

On the plus side, one of my denim skirts is now too big to wear and my usual t-shirts look overly baggy and swamping (and therefore not flattering). The thing is that I find it quite hard to believe as - depending on the scales situation - I may not have even lost a stone yet (if my scales are right. SURELY I must have lost at least a stone in the first 3 weeks. Pleeeease.). And as I want to lose quite alot of weight (5 1/2 - 6 stone) that's not a significant proportion. But I am cautiously pleased. Fingers crossed for those new manual scales to be right all along - you would see the rare sight (on this diet) of me actually being very happy!

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