I am forgetting my classical education (it was some time ago) – January is named after the god Janus who has two faces and looks back into the past and forward into the future. So I guess a bit of introspection is no bad thing as long as it doesn’t mar my determination to forge ahead with proper, significant weight loss. I carefully wrote all my WIs from last year into this year’s diary so I can chart progress. I don’t have the scores until mid April and by then I’m hoping to be a good stone and a half lighter than I was at that point in 2011. That would only just take me under my lowest weight ever after my second bout of LighterLife but I’d be a size 14 then.
As it is, I put on 8 1/4 lbs over Christmas! In two weeks! Eeek! SoD was resolute - it even threatened me with an extra 1/4 lb if I persisted in not believing it. It ought to spur me on but it's actually rather depressing. I don't know what I was this time last year - at least 1/2 stone heavier I think - but I don't feel I've achieved much in the way of decreasing myself in the last year.
Today I am battling with withdrawal from the evil of sugar. Twinned with the mild depression which January seems to induce every year and the boredom of being back at work (or is that tripletted?) it’s a tough one. I’m missing fruit, I’m missing constant nibbling, I’m missing bready stuff, I’m missing green tea (I know, call me a sybarite) and I’m missing chocolate/cake/sugar. Sigh. Compare and contrast yesterday’s menu with today’s:
Breakfast – fat free yoghurt with figs, almonds and honey. 3 Scotch pancakes with butter
Lunch – prawn crystal rolls, 2 pieces shortbread with chocolate chips, mango.
Dinner – mini baguette with frankfurters and caramelised onions and ketchup (a posh hot-dog I guess), chocolate éclair (eaten, inappropriately, WHILST watching the Biggest Loser).
Breakfast – 2 cold sausages wrapped in bacon, full fat plain yoghurt
Lunch – homemade celeriac and stilton soup with small piece brie
Dinner – (to be eaten in the car en route to choir) egg and ham mayo with chicory. Small quantity dark chocolate
It’s not that I feel deprived – I do like the food on this - but I miss the bready, sugary crap. And even more, I miss constant grazing. Grazing will turn me into the human variety of cow though – not nearly as cute and certainly not pretty in a wedding dress. Deep breath....