Friday 22 June 2007

The Last Supper. Again.

I heard from my LL Counsellor (LLC) last night. In fact, she's probably quite scared of me as I appear to have been stalking her! I got the magic text to say that the group is on for Monday night! My period of limbo is coming to an end and by this time next week I'll be on Day 4. So we'll do the last supper ritual again this weekend and I'm hoping for a new me pdq.

If worrying was an Olympic sport, I would be representing Great Britain. So already, churning uneasily at the back of my mind are anxieties like 'will I like the other people in the group?', 'will they like me?', 'what if I hate all the foodpacks', 'what if I'm the first person that this doesn't work for?' (what with my superhuman powers of accumulating and hanging on to fat - I mean, why? Other people have talents like, I don't know, playing the violin or being a whizz at maths (shudder), why is mine the relentless clinging on to blubber?). So I suppose it's really that I've invested so much hope in this already (not to mention woman-hours on blogs and minimins etc) that I'm frightened that my last chance saloon will in fact be a waiting room to more internal recriminations, pain and self-loathing.

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