Goodness it was hard work this morning. I had no energy at all and was cycling - cartoon style - into a strong head wind. So my legs were frantically revolving but I didn't appear to be moving much at all. Don't know if it was biorhythms - or what made me so tired - but I had to cling to the idea that if I felt that tired I must be burning extra calories and putting on more muscle and grimly keep my legs pumping.
And people are extraordinarily stupid. They turn and gawp at me, turn back and then step deliberately into my path. And, given the choice between the bit of the pavement that's marked for bikes and the bit that's marked for pedestrians, they take the cycle path every time! I nearly hit a particularly stupid specimen today who was actually on a cycles-only road crossing, I had to stop with screeching brakes - she turned and smirked at me all the way along the road (she got across, I missed the lights), grrrr.
Bit concerned with Mrs' comment on my post yesterday. Am I a glutton? Possibly, yes, sigh. Food does really matter to me. I can deal with small rations all the way through the week if I can have a more expansive meal at the weekend (expansive not in the way of trousers ideally). And if I can choose real food, albeit miniscule portions. (And if there's anyone as obsessed with food as me: one of my bunches of asparagus, I blanched then wrapped each stem in a piece of proscuitto and roasted for 20 mins - YUM!) But anyway, I think that what I'm doing is the right thing for me, even if I eat too many calories every now and again - so generally, strict calorie control 5 days a week, more relaxed 1 day a week and somewhere in the middle 1 day a week and lots of exercise where possible. I have lost half a stone this way since Easter and am almost back to pre-Easter weight. Now, let's not get too excited about this - I still have the following steps to take:
1) LL finishing weight (half a stone away)
2) Lowest weight yet (1st 3lbs away)
3) Healthy BMI (3st 3lbs away)
4) Goal (3st 9lbs away)
It all sounds pretty tough and over-whelming spelt out like that. I want to think I'll get there but I'm not utterly convinced. And let's remember, Food Focus reckons it will take me until end of October/beginning of November WITH NO LAPSES and consistent results. Hmmmm (can you hear the scepticism? I'm stroking my imaginary beard). Lowest weight yet sounds pretty good (and a long way away) - this is consistently a small size 14. Which means my summer clothes would fit - a definite bonus! I think for me the challenge is to keep going and not allow myself to be de-railed - to basically not be a perfectionist and allow myself to think 'oh bugger, I've blown it' and then continue in that style until pulled up short (and fat) some weeks further down the line.
Please think of one of my very best friends, R, who is about to spectacularly drop a wodge of weight any day now in the form of a baby. She's very slight and slender and has managed to put weight on only on her baby bump (despite early cravings for sausage rolls (very out of character) - but the bump is so impressive, she has to wear a rucksack to balance her! Okay, I made that bit up but it does look like it.