Cookie monster

I’ve done two pretty good starve days this week and have only been prevented from doing a third by having to have tests for cholesterol and diabetes this morning where I had to have two blood tests interspersed by a seriously unpleasant sweet drink.  I’m not worried about diabetes as I don’t have any of the symptoms but I am worried a bit about my heart because a)I do have some symptoms (although I’ve been so under pressure at work I tend to think that if I did have a problem, I’d have keeled over by now) and b) because they seem to push out statins with such eagerness and abandon these days and I really don’t want them.

My non-starve days have been less good.  I had a cookie frenzy on Tuesday and yesterday was just a bit carby.  Next week I'll have to work on the non-starve days too and get them looking more like a diet.  The cookie frenzy was at Ben's; I only allow myself to go there maybe a couple of times a year but they really are the best cookies.  And it actually stops me buying cookies anywhere else as there is no point.  But a buy 3 and get 4 is not the amazing and irresistible offer I thought it was.  Yes.  Four.

 

On the plus side, one of the starve days was against the backdrop of a psychology session, feeling generally ill and a tricky day so I was particularly impressed with myself that I stuck to it and didn't use any of these things as an excuse not to starve.  I couldn't have really after cookie-gate - or alternatively I could have decided this week had already been rendered pointless (not in a WW way, obv!)

 

Work remains a challenge - the volume of work is slightly less but this is due to something incredibly frustrating acting as a blocker.  Still, I live in hope of getting a lunch hour one day next week.  I do leave feeling like a limp, wrung out rag most evenings and I can't carry on like this.  Okay, that was just to give me an illusion that I have a choice!  I have a new boss who is very funny and seems really lovely - he's like a camp, English version of Graham Norton.  We work in a bit of a blame culture where people eagerly look out for and pounce on mistakes, ignoring good work, which is sapping and depressing.  I hope he can cope because my life is a lot more pleasant and a lot easier with him in it.  I only had my tests because he made me feel that there would be no repercussions if I was out of the office for half a day: there is no way I could have done that up to now.

 

Dear me, this is so dull, I am actually boring myself.  Will try to be more interesting next week.  If I can carve out a bit of life outside work for myself that is....