Out of sheer cussed-mindedness I have been harassing the Scales of Doom (yes, giving in to it and accepting this is their name); on Friday I was Fat.0 (you may recall), on Sunday I was Porky.13 (hurrah) and today I was back to Fat.0. Umm... I know it’s only the Friday reading wot counts, but with a certain level of detachment, it’s interesting to see the lack of consistency. I suspect my detachment will vanish into a hyperventilating, sobbing mass of freakery if tomorrow tells me Fat.1 of course. I don’t deserve it but my faithless body knows no shame. Not in a sordid way, I hasten to add, purely in a lard-clinging way.
We may have found our wedding venue at the weekend – I loved its downright eccentricity and the real can-do enthusiasm of the staff. I also like the fact we could treat our guests to more and better booze and have a much more personal day. And then we saw a horrid venue too – quite useful in a way I guess. But bf was pretty tetchy all weekend, I behaved like a wuss right up until the time I felt I had to tackle it. Note to self: 10.30pm on a Sunday is not the time to let all your bottled up angst erupt. I got 2 ½ hours sleep. He got a little more. Because we were rowing, folks. All horrid, horrid, horrid. I can’t bear arguments, they leave me bruised (metaphorically) and wounded – I can’t say my piece, accept things can be said in the heat of an argument that need to be set in that context and then feel the air is cleared and move on. I wish I could. The wedding appears still to be on so it can’t be that bad.
We also went to get a glimpse of a venue that we’re booked in to see next month. It is a NT stately home. It was fairly reasonably priced (in the crazy world of weddings) but then again, we’re way off season. I’m so glad we were passing as I wouldn’t have been able to keep a poker face when the wedding co-ordinator showed us round ..... the cafe. Seriously. It’s in the overflow room of the cafe, nowhere near the house, but in the car park. Oh the romance; be still my beating heart. And this was after the venue that looked a bit and smelt a lot of an institution (possibly an incarcerating one) where the wedding planner lady gaily introduced me to the concept of ‘bridal bric-a-brac’ which was run by their ‘Head of Titillation but we call her Tits. She’s such a one!”. I would not let this woman loose on my wedding for fear that I’d knock Jordan into a deep funk of envy. They were heavy on pink polyester in their photos which should have been warning enough.
5 comments:
My dear, put the effing scales in the loft, or a cupboard, or smash them with a lump hammer. Weight fluctuation is normal. NORMAL! My weight fluctuates by about 5lbs over the course of a week and of course, I want to kill things when I see that peak. But it is just my bod, it's just what it does. I am having this very same discussion with a load of friends at the moment - all this weighing is addictive, but destructive, very much like all bad habits (I hear crack can be much the same). But seriously - it it said 1lb lighter you'd be so happy. Just get off the SODding things (ha, see what I did there?). Ironically, weighing yourself too much is the opposite of healthy.
Ditto - I'm with Claire. Weight normally fluctuates, especially over the weekend (mine's usually down on Sat because I get up so much later than a weekday) and then up by the end of the weekend because I've used all my flex points and eaten more processed stuff. The good thing is you saw the lower weight at all, which means it's not long now before you'll see it again. Just keep eating well and you'll be fine.
Glad you found your venue though - that's one big stress off your mind.xx
I guess I'll stick my neck out here - I'm a daily "weigher". Mind you, I don't weigh more than once a day - people who do that mystify me...
My reason for weighing is simple - it keeps me relatively accountable (and I use that term very loosely these days!). Most of the time I can stay sort of detached about the numbers - they can nonsensically fluctuate quite a lot from day-to-day.
For me, it's when I'm hiding from the scale that is most worrisome. When I don't weigh, I'm in binge mode. I wish I could say otherwise, but that is the truth.
Maybe I just need to find another way of keeping track of being accountable - like stickers on the calendar?
Do what works for you, Peridot.
Funny how some people can just get over a fight and go to sleep (like my husband). I lie there and stew in angst, like you. It sounds like you'll get it all sorted out.
The "Tits" thing? Oh my. Are you sure they didn't have a hidden camera somewhere, secretly taping your reaction for a comedy show?
How exciting that you've found your wedding venue! Boo to tetchy bfs and rowing though. Is the tetchiness wedding related? Mine refused to even talk about the wedding, let along engage in making decisions about it, until the beginning of this year...
Daily weight fluctuations are a depressing thing, and I have to say, I find myself happier in general if I just ignore the scales until the Moment Of Truth. Of course, you have to do what works for you - but daily weighing is only useful if you can be fairly detached about it.
Right, onwards and downwards, and all things crossed for Porky to make a reappearance on Friday!
Sx
I'm in the weigh every day too. I find that once you see the fluctuations you start to recognise the trends rather than fretting about the nonsensical ups and downs.
I think I might have to start looking at wedding venues...not getting married you understand (am still married in fact...) but it sounds hilarious, especially the woman called Tits!!
Tell us more, pleeeeease....
Sorry you guys had a row. I'm sure it's all made up now but I empathise. I too know how hard it is to bring greivances into the open at the right time and in the right way. I steel myself to do it with Rich 'cos I remember how difficult it made things with D not being able to express myself and I really don't want to start off on the wrong track...
Practise makes perfect they say??
Lesley xx
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