Thursday 20 August 2009

Meanwhile, back in the real world...

In anticipation of today's predicted thunder storms (inc torrential rain) I managed to score an appointment with a GP tonight to beg them for more migraine drugs (apparently this has to be done in person because a repeat prescription is too easy - and making an appointment to see a GP is actually migraine-inducing ironically, it's taken me c3 weeks). If I know I can't cycle, I try to schedule other things too so as not to miss too many opportunities to down-size myself. As it is, when I checked the forecast last night they seemed to have changed their mind about rain - grrr. But with the doc appointment there was going to be no return to cycling today. So I hauled myself out of bed early (did I mention how tired I am?) so that I could get off the tube early and walked 3 miles in carrying a very heavy bag - I'm hoping that will help. Hear the faint desparation?!

Thinking on the walk in, I came to the sad conclusion that I'm deluding myself in hoping I can drop the best part of a stone in 5 weeks. You all knew that already, didn't you? Especially given that my birthday and bf's birthday occurs in that time. I reckon that half a stone is probably the best I can do (and that's without factoring in my decidedly sluggish metabolism) - and that ain't gonna get me in clamdiggers or last year's skirts. Sigh. I need to start planning on the basis of my current meagre wardrobe.

I also need to set some ground rules for myself for on holiday. I seem to have got into this pattern where I painstakingly lose 1/2 stone s-l-o-w-l-y, only to have a holiday and put on 10lbs - 1 stone. I'm never going to get back to my size 14s at this rate. We do want to do a walk and there are bikes at the hotel which we'll have a go on and I'll try and swim too (I am a rubbish swimmer of the head out of water brigade). I don't tend to drink much in Turkey so that helps on the calorie front - I don't want to feel miserable and deprived out there but I don't want to come back a blimp (or, more accurately, more of a blimp). Food out there is pretty healthy - I'm a sucker for a chicken kebab - so even with a bit of baklava (not with ice cream, bleurgh, WHY mask the nutty, syrupy loveliness with bland dairy goo?) and the odd piece of Turkish delight, it should be possible to not re-chub too much. That's the theory...

Having not cycled today I really need to watch my calories. And I'm still really hungry pretty much all of the time so that's going to be hard. I've stuck it all in Food Focus and it tallies at 1233 for today - if I don't get so hungry/shaky that I resort to another snack. I wanted 1200 cals max but I can't get too fussed about 33 cals (she tells self firmly). I've already downscaled my evening meal to get it down to 1233 so it's not as if I'm being blase. I guess I had better have a plan B to cater to emergency snacking. Why is this so hard at the moment? I suppose I know the answer - holiday fear + tiredness + sudden freaky hunger = slightly overwhelmed and dispirited Peridot. I'm hanging in there though.

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