Wednesday, 11 June 2014

The Great Escape

I am an arrant coward.  After a loss last time, I can’t bear to stand on SoD again.  I steeled myself to do it this morning – because I knew I needed to post.  And I forgot.  I really did but even I can see that that looks distinctly subconsciously deliberate.  I’m not sure when I can screw my courage up again.  Maybe next week (yes, that will be a fortnight.  Or possibly even 3 weeks).
On the plus side, I have found a new job.  It is only maternity cover (Amy: this is to cover whilst the incumbent goes off and has her baby – she can take up to a year) and I’m not sure what will happen after that.  Worst case scenario is that I have to find another job in a year’s time.  It was supposed to be a secondment but of course, my lovely employers wouldn’t release me.  So I quit.
Work has been beyond hideous (as you know, dear Reader) so it’s good to know I’m going to escape.  It’s just a festering poisonous place of unpleasantness.  I’m amazed to hear that people outside our section can see this but I’ve had a few comments to that effect.  I suppose the fact that our staff turnover is so horrendous is a clue.  Not a clue recognised by our own senior managers but still.
I’m dreading my last day – there’s usually a bit of a speech made and I don’t think my boss is going to want to say nice things about me.  He acknowledges I’m good at my job but apparently this is not enough.  Funnily enough, he is not good at his job but IS very good at the corporate brown-nosing.  He’ll doubtless go far.
I think I’m not being as strict with carbs as I should be – everything has been so crazy I simply haven’t had the energy and time to think about each food choice.  I am aware that sounds like an excuse but it’s actually true.  I need to get back on top of this – and maybe then I wouldn’t fear the SoD so much.  Oh who am I kidding….!


Gabby said...

Congratulations on the new job! Maternity cover or not (and who knows, it may become permanent) it is an unequivocally woderful thing that you get to leave that poisonous place you're at now. I expect a whole host of things will improve once you're out of there, and weight loss might be easier with less stress too.

Linz M said...

Congrats on the new job, maternity cover or not, it's a lovely chance to escape!


Seren said...

Fantastic news! Don't worry about SoD, hopefully once you're in a better work environment you'll be in a better mental place to deal with them.


amy said...

Lol. Of course a "maternity cover" is precisely what it sounds like. I love how you English name things. In America, we use euphemisms that bear little or no resemblance to the actual thing!!!

Best of luck on the new job.

Hazel said...

Good for you - it'll be like a breath of fresh air being out of your difficult work environment.

And the last day that you're worried about? Skip it with a 'migraine'.

Lesley said...

Oh thank God for that!! Soooo pleased you're getting out. As you will have spotted I'm also in avoidance mode although edging back to accountability....let's brave the scales together?? Tomorrow morning?? L xx