Tough love - and dilemmas

So I was talking to Naughty R last night and was talking about why I have this emotional attachment to food and she said "You're just fucking greedy"! It made me laugh. Maybe she's right - but if so, why am I greedy when I know it causes me pain in the long run? Can't help thinking there's more to it than that but maybe I'm deluding myself.

Dilemma #1: I have seen a potential dress for my brother's wedding. I've only seen it in a supplement and I have no idea if it would actually suit me, although it looks promising. It's dark olive with a pale olive sash detail and I wanted to get some coloured clashing shoes - Naughty R suggested yellow, which would be perfect. I was passing a Hobbs this lunchtime and in their sale they have some gorgeous (if high) yellow peep toe shoes, reduced from £139 to £39. The dilemma is: do I get them and gamble on the dress being right or do I wait and gamble on being able to buy yellow shoes (as nice) later in the year? I dithered but the helpful sales assistant in the store said I could call them and have them set aside but of course when I DID call the unhelpful sales assistant (a different one) said not! Now I can't readily get them I'm stressing that the decision will be taken away from me.

Dilemma #2: Naughty R is keen for us to join a gym. In theory I'm quite interested - especially as there's one in between our offices that's £50 a week (and £39 joining fee) but only when I'm not paying £66pw for packs. But could I/should I still run? Or should I stick to the running? I don't enjoy it but my mother said she can see my thighs are slimmer and it's free. And should I join a gym at all? Hmmmm

LL class was annoying. The same two women massively monopolised the session and the rest of us just sat there whilst they talked and talked and talked about themselves. And the whole attitude of 'packs are good and healthy' annoys me. They're not healthy, they're a quick fix. Losing weight is obviously good for your health but that's where it stops. I know - and feel they should too - that the healthy way to lose weight is with a healthy diet and loads of exercise, it's just that that's bloody hard and takes alot of time, effort, focus and determination - none of which I have much of. I will NOT be incorporating packs into my life, long-term as was suggested - there's a new bar that the LLC said is for management. I queried why you'd want a bar on management and LLC said it's convenient to carry around. It's a crutch! Not a bar! A crutch! And not one I'd want. And it's covered in chocolate - how's THAT for twisted thinking, healthy? I don't think so - so let's not pretend otherwise. Phew, bit of a rant there.