I have not been a good blogger recently; I think I have become disenchanted with myself, wearied by what I have to say, bored by continually treading the same well-worn path. Jade is a lovely colour, a pretty stone, a very 90s name - but not a good state of mind. A break will do me good!
Because, dear Reader, I am off on the much-anticipated honeymoon on Saturday. Fatter than I'd like, fatter than I'd intended but determined to make the most of it. And by making the most of it, I don't mean 24 hour gorging on the boat. Sorry, that's liner! Instead I mean not allowing how I feel about myself, especially in unaccustomed cocktail and ball wear (I know, shocking isn't it, I bet you imagined me graciously living in posh frocks most of the time!) to spoil the moment. Chances are, since I seem to be not very good at winning the lottery, this IS a one-off and I do not want to look back and regret anything.
I need a break. I was very upset this week by someone being mean to me on Twitter. It really wasn't the end of the world in the whole scheme of Twitter-meaness, but I really allowed it to distress me. And then 3 good things happened: 1) someone showed me that social media can be a good thing by sending me lots of California tips, 2) One of my friends was fierce in my defence (to me, not to the mean girl) and 3) Another of my friends met up with me, cheered me up and was so sweet and so determined for me to enjoy myself that I was quite taken aback although she's been a friend for 19 years. And I went from feeling like the girl who's always on the outside of the clique (which still remains true) to not caring because the friends I DO have, both 'real' and virtual are wonderful. When I come back, all-refreshed, I'm going to be a better blogger. This online community is important to me. I won't let the odd bitchy comment deter me - I've had more support than I've had unkindness.
And inevitably I'll be back on the diet wagon. I recently had a massive clear out and I have SUCH a lot of clothes that are too small for me cluttering up my wardrobe, my heart and my esteem. I need to get into them and clear out the emotional and physical baggage they represent.
Tomorrow is for ironing, painting toenails and other such vital pre-holiday prep and then Saturday we're off to Southampton to board the Queen Mary 2. Then California here we come.
Have a good few weeks; I intend to.