The Flab Four

Serious change to my MO here - actually writing from home.  I don't have a proper keyboard so always post from work - but recently work has been getting the way of posting.  The nerve.  And I'm aware that it's been aaaaages since I last posted.

I don't think I actually have an overall loss since that last time.  Hidden within that stark number is the 4lbs that I put on and take off and put on and take off... I didn't do too well at the discipline around a planned cheat.  This is something I need to get better at - especially with the festive scene nudging up against us, and brandishing treats.  And I'd like to make some progress that will stop me bouncing blobbily back up to the stone bracket I worked so long and hard to escape.  I'm still just a few lbs off 3 stone - but never getting any closer to it.  It would be good to get a couple of lbs under that by the Christmas insanity.

As it is, I don't have the sort of social life that all women's magazines seem to think we do - all those articles on glittery evening wear, who do they aim that stuff at?  Reader: do you spend the whole of Christmas shimmying from one black tie do to another?  Maybe it's just me...

But the silver lining here is that I don't have innumerable social functions - and all the attendant food and drinks - to navigate.  We have a cheap and cheerful team lunch - which I may not be able to go to anyway because my workload is increasing and stockpiling up to Christmas week.  I won't be sorry if I don't - I suffer from societal anxiety which means large groups are miserable for me, even if I know them all and I can duck the high quantity, low quality food that this will inevitably involve.  We have a weekend away in Aldeburgh which will be quite foodie and a good opportunity for me to practice the discipline-around-planned-cheats thing.  And dinner the Friday before Christmas with my stepson and his current girlfriend - it's a set meal with small portions so it's just the booze to navigate.  I've foresworn cocktails for gin and diet tonics, which is a small help.  But P and his son (and the gf, to a lesser extent) are absolute booze hounds, when they get together and egg each other on.  By that time, we're deep into festive excesses in any case.  (See also: the discipline-around-planned-cheats thing).

Also on the threats list would be the return of Christmas tapas!  I am calorie counting those so that shouldn't derail me (those mini pies! Ouch.  They are having to be a meal on their own).  But there is definitely an increase in temptation at this time of year - and I am absolutely rubbish at resisting.  I'm trying not to think about the variety of deliciousness suddenly adorning every shop, every ad, every everything, whilst edging around them both literally and figuratively.

And on the opportunities list: I have my third fill on Thursday.  As you know, I haven't had any reaction to the fills so far (although perhaps there's something in Lesley's idea that there has been a slight psychological effect).  I can't help but think that surely, SURELY, it must work this time.  In any case, I have a very hungry, difficult three days ahead of liquids only.  Last time I thought that would cause a jolt down on the scales and it didn't.  And yes, I'm still sulking about that.  But maybe this time...  Fingers crossed. And then we'll see.