Time’s fool

It’s exactly a month to go before my op.  I have never experienced anything like this – the closest was having a couple of wisdom teeth out under general anaesthetic.  That didn’t go well….  Anyway, that was about 20 years ago and I’m sure the anaesthetic is better now.  And the surgeon is clearly a pro – he’s been doing these ops for, well, about 20 years, co-incidentally. But I am sure I will be very scared, come the day.  However, I am very focused on the ends justifying the means.  As you may or may not know, dear Reader, I log my weight most days on Happy Scale.  It gives you stats based on a week, a month, three months and ever.  Reader: I have lost 0.7lb in three months.  That is heartbreaking.  I think I would be struggling to cope, mentally, if I didn’t have the op to ‘look forward’ to.  I have to believe that this is going to make a difference.

And in fact it all kicks off before 16^thJune.  Most surgeons want you to go on what is essentially a VLCD diet for anything from about a week to about a fortnight in advance of surgery.  This is, apparently, for two reasons: firstly to get you used to the very small quantities you’ll be eating, post-op (by which I mean the small quantities I will be eating) and secondly something about it shrinking the liver as they have to get to the stomach which is behind it (pauses whilst those who are of a similarly squeamish disposition to me, scream and/or faint).

‘My’ surgeon laughed dismissively when I mentioned this, he felt sure my liver would offer no problem that he, with his 20 years of experience, was not more than equal to (he’d had a prod around my stomach – not sure exactly how scientific that was!).  Just don’t have a blow out meal the night before, he advised.  I mentioned this to the HW lady who was a bit taken aback.  She said it was up to the surgeon but she hadn’t come across one who hadn’t wanted some sort of dieting in advance.  Had I gone for the NHS option, I would have had to lose 10% of my body weight to demonstrate my seriousness.  Which as I was there because I couldn’t lose weight, seemed a Herculean task doomed to failure. 

I actually think I will do the VLCD – maybe for a week.  There are various versions of this – one is called the milk diet as you have just (a lot of) milk.  I don’t like milk so am pleased that the HW one is calorie counted – yes, more tricky but probably better for me than drinking endless coffee/cocoa to use the milk up.  It’s 800-900 calories, so absolutely no walk in the park.  It needs A Plan.  I think I will have to abandon all my food beliefs (or possibly prejudices) and buy an M&S calorie counted ready meal for the evening (every evening) – they come in c300-400 cals.  I’m not mad on ready meals as a rule – they’re quite often tasteless and they tend to be quite high carb and low fat (the opposite of what I try to achieve).  I’ve yet to scope breakfasts and lunches properly but I think soups for lunch (in June.  I know.) and probably yoghurt and fruit for breakfast.  I guess c200 for breakfast and the same for lunch.  I have downloaded My Fitness Pal (I’ll need to calorie count post-op too) and it looks like I can have the individual pots of Total 2% with compote for 120 cals which would leave me some cals for a peach or cherries (both of which I love and will be in season).  And generally from looking at forums, there seems to be a firm following for a high protein (but, I think, low fat) yoghurt called Skyr so will look into those too.  I’ve not had artificial sweetener for so long that it just tastes vile to me now so I’d like to avoid that but fear it might not be possible.  Any good ideas?  I’d be most grateful.