Sometimes it's hard to be a woman

I am still suffering hormonal bloat (now a fortnight overdue (if not TMI)) and feel much like Violet Beauregard – or Aunt Marge in Harry Potter.  I may yet explode.  In fact, I did over the weekend and yet I am still puffed up.

I had either very violent food poisoning or some vicious stomach bug.  This was initially good on the weight loss side – always the silver lining – but the recovering stage means I really only want toast and marmite which is not so good.  There really isn’t a low-carb equivalent to that kind of comfort, easy-eating food.  I did have scrambled eggs (P makes excellent eggs – and an excellent nurse) but again, on toast.  So I put weight on again – 1.5lbs from post- erm – ejection to today (although still down overall on the week).  And today is a starve day so let’s see what that does.  My stomach is still not happy – which is unfortunate since I have Covent Garden Soup Co Peri Peri chicken soup planned for supper (and trying to tell myself that I will NOT have toast).  I’m in the office but shooting off as soon as I’ve got an urgent outstanding issue sorted to languish on the sofa and feel sorry for myself.

I had a rotten night too – I’ve not had one for a bit, but I went to bed anxious and unhappy and it spiralled down from that point.  No-one talks about the menopause but I think I’m in perimenopause – not something I’m relishing being precocious about, my mum was about 10 years older.  But she didn’t have these symptoms.  I really think the depression, anxiety and sleeplessness I’ve had over the last couple of years is linked to my hormones; not least because the last time I felt this bad was when I was 12-13 years old.  Seems too much of a coincidence.  Apparently these symptoms can last 10 years.  I wanted to cry when I found this out.  Actually I was crying but you know what I mean.  So please, please anyone reading who’s not hit the perimenopause be aware of these symptoms so that you don’t think, like I did, that I was going mad.  It does make it a bit better.  All I knew about was hot flushes – at least I don’t have those – but there are a myriad of unpleasant health problems, including anxiety, depression, insomnia and migraine (all of which I have).  Something to look forward to, eh?  Or you may be like my mother and sail through without really noticing, fingers crossed.

Anyway, enough of this second-bout-of-teenage-angst.  Dieting is going well – post-ejection toast aside.  Last week at WI day on Thursday I lost 2lbs which is pretty stellar for me.  The first couple of Jane Plan days showed a good drop too but I won’t pre-empt the official WI.  Jane Plan? It’s okay.  It’s more breakfast than I’m used to – I had 25g granola and they give me 40g – but lunches are very small (a half cup of soup) and dinners are small too although bearable.  You also get a snack – either a small bar of quite nice dark chocolate or a very sad, small, lonely biscuit. 

Their granola is tasty, the soup (tomato) was fine but pretty tasteless and the two evening meals I had were vegetarian lasagne (really quite nice) and beef in ale casserole with root mash (okay).  I only had the lasagne first as one of the ambient packs had exploded – in the manner of an ambient and faulty breast implant – and I had to eat the contents of the pack with the most fall-out.  Shows though, as I wouldn’t have greeted vegetable lasagne with any enthusiasm whilst beef casserole sounded great – in fact, it was the other way around.

I’m still planning to do 3 x days of Jane Plan, 2 x days of starve days and 2 careful weekend days.  The starve days are to balance the weekend days.  Otherwise I take your point Mrs Spoon that it would b worth giving JP a full go – but eating with husband in the evening at the weekend is really important to us both.  Especially given that dieting is such a long haul slog for me – otherwise it could be years with us basically not eating together!